Yesterday, Amy and Colt were playing chess when I got home. It was nice because they had both worked very hard on the list I had left for them. My kitchen was clean, floors were vacuumed and mopped, laundry completed and they had gone shopping with Vernon. So I was really impressed to see them getting along so well.
But I spoke too soon, as soon as someone had won the game, chess pieces went flying and children started yelling and throwing accusations at each other. I appears that if one is to win the other is to get upset or the winner is to gloat their victory in an unseemly fashion which irritates/annoys the other to behave just as bad. I am tending on this one to take the side of the person who was in tears over the event and actions of the offender. Why? The tearful one does not usually get emotional, nor does this person usually win. So when the tearful one won - finally - the offender got pissy and offensive at the tearful one's victory.
I laid it out - in my usual multi-prong approach;
1. the tearful one doesn't usually win, and yet is never a sore loser
2. the offender should be happy for the tearful one at their accomplishment
3. it is Lent - it is time to put others ahead of ourselves - so we should be more concerned for the other person than ourselves
4. you both are irritating your father and I - cut it out
5. if you can't rejoice in the other's success then you cannot play together
6. make your choices how you will respond to others, you can't control their behavior but you can decide how you will respond - is it a response that is mature and wise? or is it the response of a toddler who cannot control their baser instincts?
7. it is only day 1 of the week, you'd better not let this continue or your father, who is home with you both, will not let either of you enjoy what remains of the vacation.
Things settled down but the offender was off by them self for the majority of the evening until the meal was served. They even missed the favorite show -"Big Bang Theory".
At least when they were 2 and 4 they were easier to distract, now they hold onto the grudge and attitude much, much longer!
2 comments:
Yes, mine are doing that now. Evie will beat Luke in a race and Luke wills start crying and being ugly and Evie will keep rubbing it in his face that she won the race. Now, if she is winning a race (to the stairs, to finish eating, whatever), he'll announce, "It isn't a race, Evie."
And the saga continues....Colt got angry at Amy this morning so he hid the TV remote then couldn't remember where he put it so he lied and said he hadn't done anything with the remote.
What is sad is that now their plans for fun have now been put on hold for Spring Break. Stupid kids! It only hurts them when they do that stuff. It just makes my life cheaper.
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